Sohai shits happened around me.

sometimes people really sohai one wor.

.1
i sms them. and they replied to a third party.
then the third party. ask a fourth party to pass the reply to me.
whats that chain all about man?
pointless right? fucking sohai.

.2
i ask them. free? "yea, why?"
lets dakei. dota. go yamcha.
"lol dun wan."
why? "busy. XD"
sohai.

.3
eh people. come my place yamcha lar.
"dun wan. so far"
...
the next day. i saw they come and pick up the gurlz.
and go back to their(the driver) place dunno do what.
...apa lanchao.
a dick and a pussy really made such big differences meh?
after all it still need to be combined right?
stupid fuck.

.4
"see. i bought this for you"
yuck thats ugliness.
"buy for you to wear"
dun wan. that sucks.
"why can't you be alil bit more sui bian one.. buy liao then wear lar"
then why you buy it. zzzzz
"cheap and worthy ma."
please. that shirts doesn't suits me ok.
"juz wear lar.. sui bian abit lar"
FUCK. WHAT IS THIS SOHAI TRYING TO DO.
but anyway. he thought i'd like it.
and he thought he knew my taste.
sighs. lastly thank him for buying it for me.
even i dun plan to wear it LOL.

.5
they got the credit.
they got the avaibility.
but they dun fucking reply my message.
msn too. even its free.
fuck. better dun gimme your fucking number at the first place.
and what for you get the handphone since you're not fully using it?
use house phone lar fuck.
another sohai.

.6
here's the 2nd times i met this kind of sohai situation.
ok. i was trying to find a plan. or join a plan.
for new year eve. no one would love to stay home and enjoy the boring air right?
so here's the thing.
first i asked a someone.
-got plan on 31st?
"no wor, stay at home lor"
-bo ko leng de dai chi
"what bo ko leng. my gang not suit you one wor"
-all gurlz?
"ya lar"
"if got plan i tell you lar, if.. "
-ok
..... after a few moment i talk to another someone...
-eh you 31st got plan or not?
"errm.. maybe.. why"
-what plan
"go sldgkpoeih house bbq lor"
-with who. the someone's(this is refer to the someone i juz mentioned juz now) gang?
"ya.."
does anyone actually understand this?
another stupid fuck.
got plan then got plan lar chibai.
some more wanna bluff me say all gurlz only.
and some more the fucking venue is juz nearby my house.
what the fuck.
2nd time d.
SECOND TIME D.

.7
here's another sohai stuff juz happened about 15 minutes ago.
i was bored and clicked on this someone msn contact.
-yo
"yo"
-where you been today? go where play?
"at home"
"play with pc"
-dun lie lar
"maybe"
MAHAI ANOTHER STUPID FUCK REPLY.
come on lar big sohai.
if you're whole day at home how possible that you will not online during the daytime??
another sohai with high pure stupidity brain.

.8
sighs.
i also dunno my msn sign in for what.
right now i have 18 contacts online.
but none of them were talking to me, or neither do i.
one. she's beautiful actually. but fat. and she never reply my message.
two. he online 24-7. and he dun reply me also. didn't even give a fuck.
three. she's the someone i mentioned juz now. a beautiful liar.
four. this fella. i've been chatting with him every night and i sienz d.
five. she's a close friend of the someone. becoming a hybrid of someone.
six. ok this person is a total asshole. his name was once called jibet.
seven. this fucktard dun treat me as friend. he's another fucker.
ok i juz deleted one contact. so thats remain 17 online.
eight. this small boy is a gaming maniac. talk to him usually. and laugh at his sohainess.
nine. i dunno why i add this fella. he blocked me for a period and unblock me.
ten. he's a gay best friend. he skinny and kiasu. one lose match and he grab his tail and ran as quick as he can.
eleven.... oops. msn juz signed out. disconnected.
eleven. he's my uncle. seldom chat. never chat. add for emergency usage.
an asshole juz offline. left 16.
twelve. this person is the one i mentioned juz now. who has the high pure stupidity brain. he has a dead cat as his msn display picture. fucking prick.
thirteen. this fatty loves my frenz. i dunno whether is he still loving her now. and he's a real big fat bully.
fourteen. this guy used to be my good friend. i guess he juz delete my contact from his good friend list though.
fifteen. this is the gay. a sohai gay. and he fucked me with his cheap broken english before. which is broken till i can't even understand a single message he was trying to deliver.
sixteen. this boy is another moron. i chat alot with him. but i guess he's juz like his brother. two face person.

is it really.. that i dun deserve a true friend?

how come.

there are friends who talk behind my back.

there are friends who treat me like a dog.

there are friends who dun treat me like their friend.

there are friends who dun really wanna maintain the relationship.

there are friends who dun care about me while i trying my best to care about them.


...is it because..

i met them at wrong time?

wrong place?

wrong reason?


i dun understand.
what is this.
i really dun understand.

feeling really down now.
everything seems blue to me.

SOHAI EVE.

PLEASE DUN WATCH THE SPIRIT!!!

FRANK MILLER IS CHEATING OUR CASH!!!!


today is christmas eve.
a very sohai one.

.1
i drive like a sohai.

.2
there's a sohai humiliated me like a sohai.

.3
watched a sohai show directed by a sohai director.

so you say..
this christmas eve sohai or not??

today my bro finally open his mouth.
nagging me.

always.
remind me this bitch.

her name is Xxx ZzzYyy.

there will be another bastard coming up.
and that bastard maybe someone close to you.

I feel so sad to live in this world.

meaningless.

heartless.

a Nobody.

got nothing.

Can I suicide? please??

So..

So...
after all i've been through.
I know I'm a freaking loser.
and I'm still denying it like a loser.

What is really happening to me actually.
I dun really understand what i want.
Maybe.. i juz haven't grown up.
People start to think as a 18.
I juz grow like a 18, but think like a 9.

Juz now I juz saw the result of the character design competition.
2 frenz of mine, got the prizes.
One gets the champion.
One gets the consolation prize.
and I get nothing.
Tomorrow they will be going to PWTC to retrieve their reward, with pride.
I'll be going PC fair and stuck myself between endless shoulders. with emptiness feeling.
They'll live it proud.
And I'll live it sad, normal, stable, ordinary.

I know whats wrong with me.
And I knew it for long time.
Every promises I made, has never came true.
Never execute. and I feel terribly sad for that.
My frenz was right. I didn't really put effort on his drawing.
and I lied to him, to protect my artist pride.

Sighs.
I wonder what is the very main reason that keeps me away from being a hardworking person.
is it because the life is way too good?
or... I juz dun really give a fuck about life.
Everytime my frenz ask me out. I'll told them I was too busy to hang out.
and actually..
I was sitting in front of this very monitor everytime.
I often tells my lecturer and frenz that I stay far away.
thats why sometimes I can't catch up the assignments because of time wasted on travelling.
but thats juz bullshit.
I know. Its really some bullshit.

After all this shits.
I told myself.
I made a promise myself.
I wanna be a time conscious person.
I wanna done everything within the time frame.
I wanna be more hardworking. more productive.
But..
It always ends up with a 0.




what is happening.
what is really going on.
i dun really understand.
and i dun really know.
i wanna find a way to solve it.
i wanna find a way to adapt it.
but after this.
i'll forget it. and give myself a list of excuses.
just to run away from it.
now i know.
Luck dun come to you.
You go to the luck.
You move yourself to the Luck.
people gets Lucky because they made their move.



5 minutes later.
again. i'll run away.
i'll run like a fugitive.
scares to face the judgement.
escape from responsibility.
live in my own world.

I wanna change.
I really really wanna change.
but talk isn't going to help.
It takes steps.
But i still figuring. When is my real first step.
I need guidance.
But at the end.
Everything. Still on My own.

Life is really tough.
Stand still and Die.
Move forward and Live.

What the Fuck is this???

Stuff that i feel "WTF".

stuff number 1.

what is this kind of shit anyway? does this gurl learnt ABC before?

holyfucked, or i should say she's too smart to create a new typo font???

lol this is fucking WTF lar.

stuff number 2.

my cpu operating system.
can you see the fucking difference?
the 2nd picture is the most recent one.
juz "print screen" few minutes ago.
sohai one my cpu OS. one thunder strike.
then go into some CHKDSK system. after that.
the whole pc hang in the login screen.
AFTER THAT.
the fucking fonts become FUCKING bold.
and some becomes FUCKING italic.
now i muz get used to this fucking bold font.
beh tahan liao.
wanna reformat d.
but scare reformat. many things gone =(
lazy go install back.

Review on Resident Evil Degeneration.

Juz finished watching a new 3D animation by CAPCOM.

based on their own franchise. "Resident Evil".

The movie title is .

Resident Evil : Degeneration.

I won't talk about the storyline now.

cause its all about personal benefits by using viruses that infect people and make them become a zombie.

errr... if anyone of you aren't interested in 3D.. i guess you can close this window now.

ok.

modelling wise. i dun really like it.

the shoulders are big, and high, for a female.

the character modelling wasn't that good.

i dun really like Leon's modelling though. He looks sucks than he's in Resident Evil 4 (game).

and Claire's modelling also not that good also.

her lips was so not natural, but i guess the team juz trying to make looks cuter.

but i love the original modelling of Claire, that appear on PS2 years ago.

and for the mapping skills. i think the style was abit too clean.

Everything seems so perfect, clean, and shiny.

The objects was too clean.

and the skin of the characters are juz too fair and godlike.

I hope they can do something like Silent Team (the team that make Silent Hill) characters' modelling.
at least the skin mapping texture have some dirty parts or spots.

motion wise...
the walking motion doesn't look natural to me.

even though that was performed by motion actors.

other motion was quite ok.

and.. one more thing.

their hands contact didn't really achieve a 100% contact.

example like.. when they hold stuff, if you notice clearly.

some scene their hands like juz off the objects alil bit.

so.. it looks kinda odd to me when i saw that. cause.. after all, thats from CAPCOM.

so.. i really expect as much as like what i expected in Square-Enix movies.

other than that.

i can really feel the weight of everything.

i can see and recognize the face expression.

every acts was ok.

oh ya, forget one last thing =.=

their lip synching.

didn't look obvious and accurate to me.

hope CAPCOM will notice that.

but i'm sure that they won't happen in their games though.

lightings.

i like it. and i finally understand.

the meaning of confusing lighting.

after i watch the show.

every lighting of the scenes look really good.

like it alot. =)

CG effects, good, but can be better.

maybe i juz expect too much from them.

cause i'm used to and looking forward to Square-Enix standard.

well.. the whole animation.

lightings modelling effects and everything.

i give... 3.5 of 5.

=) does anyone actually read this??? =.=

hope that i can achieve that level.

then advanced to square-enix level.
then become more and more better =).

HOPEFULLY lar.

Kawan-Kawan

Today i went out to meet my frenz.
yeah, we had a great time.
and .. lol, there's this gurl become more and more sexy as she grow XD.
looking at her juz make me feel like offending the law. LOL


so.. after that my frenz says tonight got yamcha..
and then the same question disturbed me again, transport.

sometimes.. i think my bro was right.
he's situation indirectly tells me that. Friends, no matter where you stay.
Fetching, is really not a problem.
some more.. i purposely, ask my bro wake up from his sweet dreams, go and meet you guys.
i juz ask, whether you can fetch me back or not.. then you guys gave me that sad look.
i didn't force you all. but.. isn't friends all about.. sacrificing alil bit??
i have met different kinds of people.
but most of them, they help me because they "顺路".
its not like.. they help, because they take me like a friend.
but i felt lucky, that i have a friend, who treat me like a friend, and a bastard.

hmmm sometimes these kind of shits happens.
i juz dunno who to blame.
is it that.. fetching so susah? or.. you juz dun take me seriously?

sighs, confused.

KENAPA!!!!

why the fuck that my Ma can be so stupid one..
she's really a sohai you know.

she likes to collect useless items lar.
last night.
there's this guy closes his shop and wanna throw their items away.
and my Ma. brainlessly take some of the thrown item back to our house.
and its not something small.
its SOMETHING that BIG.

2 BIG GLASS CABINET HOLY SHIT.

HOLY FUCKED.
why the fuck she wanna take their thrown items back.
i really cannot understand lar.
she so into collecting people's leftover.
if she pick something nice and useful.
then i'll probably shut my fucking mouth.
but she's not.
SHE BROUGHT THAT 2 CABINET.
IT'S SPACE WASTING. BECAUSE ITS BIG.
DANGEROUS BECAUSE OF HARD AND SHARP EDGES.
AND ITS JUZ HAVE THE SAME FUNCTION AS THE OLD RACK.
JUZ TO PUT STUFF ON IT. JUZ THAT IT HAS A COVER.
BUT WHO THE FUCK NEED THE COVER ANYWAY?!
AND ITS SO NOT COMFORTABLE WHEN I LOOKING AT IT.
AN INDOOR ITEM PLACED AT THE OUTDOOR.

WHAT THE FUCK?!

GOD KENAPA!!!!
HOW COME YOU MAKE MY MA LOOK LIKE A GARBAGE COLLECTOR??!!
WE'RE NOT POOR OR BROKE.
WE'RE JUZ NGAM NGAM HOU. AN OK OK FAMILY WITH LESS OK OK FINANCIAL SUPPORTS.
BUT WHY THE FUCK YOU WANNA MAKE MY MA'S A GARBAGE COLLECTOR?!
HOLY SHIT.
REALLY HOLY MOTHERFUCKED LAR THIS TIME.



***below message is for my Ma.****
DUN BE SUCH A SOHAI CAN OR NOT?!
DUN BE SUCH A BRAINLESS SELFISH MOTHER CAN OR NOT?!
YOU KNOW WHEN YOU GIVE ME THAT FUCKING REACTION WHEN I ASK YOU DUN GO FOR WORTHLESS USELESS STUPID IDIOTIC TOUR.
I WAS LIKE FUCKING SHOCK THAT YOU'LL EVER THINK AND REACT LIKE THAT. LIKE I'M NOT MAKING SENSE. LIKE YOU RATHER GO FOR SOME SOHAI MOTHERFUCKING BRAINLESS TOUR THAN BUYING ME A NEW PC FOR ME TO DO BETTER WORK FOR SCHOOL.
WHAT THE FUCK LAR MOTHER.
ONCE AGAIN I WOULD LIKE TO SAY IT OUT LOUD.

WE ARE NOT FUCKING POOR OR FUCKING BROKE.
WE DUN NEED TO COLLECT UNNECESSARY GARBAGE FROM PEOPLE'S LEFTOVER.
WE JUZ NEED TO KEEP OUR MONEY THATS IT.
WHY THE YOU EVEN THINK ABOUT PICKING LEFTOVER AND THOUGHT IT'LL MAKE FUCKING USEFUL TO THE HOUSE?!
DO YOU KNOW WHATS THE MEANING OF USEFUL OR NOT.
DO YOU REALLY UNDERSTAND WHATS MEAN OF USEFUL OR NOT.
"USEFUL" IS A WORD THAT CAN COVER UP THE DISADVANTAGES OF STUFF AND NOT JUZ COVER. ITS SHOWS MORE THAN 2 CONTRIBUTION TO THE PEOPLE OR WHATSOEVER.
PLEASE LAR MOMMY.
I DUN MIND YOU PICK LEFTOVERS.
BUT PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE THINK 10 TIMES BEFORE YOU PICK LAR.
THINK OF IT WHETHER ITS USEFUL OR NOT FIRST LAR.
THE GLASS CABINET IS FUCKING USELESS.
I ASK YOU TO THROW IT THEN JUZ THROW IT LAR.
WHY THE FUCK YOU STILL WANNA KEEP IT.
MAHAI. THIS TIME REALLY STUPID LAR.

AND WHY THE FUCK YOU'LL THINK GOING TOUR IS BETTER THAN UPGRADING YOUR SON PC. I ALSO CANNOT UNDERSTAND THIS QUESTION.
YOU ARE SO FUCKING SOHAI AND BRAINLESS.
I FEEL SO SAD TO HAVE A SO STUPID MOTHER.
NO. NOT MOTHER.

A GARBAGE COLLECTOR!!!!

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Sohai Kawan Kumiliki.

I just wanna ask why...
HOW THE MOTHERFUCKED THAT THOSE WHO AROUND ME ARE MOSTLY MADE UP WITH SOHAI'S ATTRIBUTE AND INGREDIENTS?!

BETUL BETUL HOLY FUCK LAR.
FAMILY LIKE THAT.
FRIEND ALSO LIKE THAT.
HOLY SHIT.

so... today i'm not gonna talk about my family.
cause i've already talked about them. so...
yeah, you guessed it.

MY FRIEND.

you see.. i have this friend.
he's older than me. he's literally smarter than me in academic.
he's taller than me. he looks better than me.
he's fitter than me. he's more muscular than me.
so.. yeah, he's like good at outside...
but.. what he sohai about was...

HIS FUCKING RETARDED BRAIN AND MENTALITY.
and..
HIS SOHAI HEART.
you see..
he's not that kind of very good attitude person you know..
he likes to LAN SII.
he likes to ACT PRO AS IF HE WERE.
he likes to ACT LIKE A BIG BRO AS IF I'M GONNA RESPECT HIM LIKE GOD.
and he.. ALWAYS EXPECT PEOPLE TO DO WHAT HE WANTED. without
CONCERNING OTHERS ABILITY HOLY FUCKED.

ok i dunno how to describe him furthermore..
i think i better list some examples.

.1
he always order me to do stuff. like he's really my brother.
and thought like i was scare of him.
and i asked him why. he says.
"because i'm better in anything of you."

.2
he always likes to insult me. and tell his friends i'm a fucking loser.
and then when i fight back, he diuz me fucker sohai.
so... whats that about man?
i'm his dog? yea, he treats me like a dog.
and still.. the same reason.
"because you're a fucking loser, so i can fuck you."

.3
alright.. he's not a man i gotta say.
yea he likes sex, cigarettes, alcohol, pussies. like other man does.
but he dun have that gentlemen radiant attraction.
he's not a cool guy to anybody. he's like a sohai also.
he's small gas (errr i dunno whats in english) he's hot tempered.
and.. he has this.. fucking high self confident with him.
...and. juz now i bought 100 plus for him.
and the top of the bottle has some.. other drinks spilled on it.
so.. he asked me to take the drinks and change another bottle.
so i do what he says lor, cause i also dunno whats that stain at first.
then after the shop dealer explained, then i think its ok lar.
so i bring that old drinks to my friend. and i tell him what happened.
and then you know what he says?
"fucking go and change it lar fuck, mahai so stupid one you"
"never mind one lar, its not poison or something"
"fucking sohai why you" "AIYA FUCK LAR YOU POISONED THEN I PAY FOR YOUR MEDICAL FEE LAR FUCK"
thats our conversation juz now.
i mean.. how come he can be like.. so countitive.
juz a small little.. "clean" stain what.. its not going to kill him or whatso fucking ever right.
and some more he diuz me at the public.
like a dog.
is he a fucking retarded or what???
he doesn't have this.. humanity lar.
fucking stupid one.

.4
and he has this fucking bad attitude.
he likes to 'siap' what i ordered when i go out eat with him.
and he says.. "you shut up, i wan siap then siap"
i mean what the fuck lar, how come he can be like.. so ba dao.
i tell him DUN, then he still siap..
so.. is he a human looking dog or??
i'm extremely fucking clueless about that.
and when i dun let him.. he adds another sentence.
"so countitive one you"


SO... OVERALL ALL I WANNA SAY IS
...THIS KIND OF SOHAI FRIEND, REALLY DRIVING ME CRAZY.
I SWEAR TO GOD.

I'M MOTHERFUCKED SWEARING TO GOD NOW.

IF HE EVER INSULT ME AGAIN!!! ESPECIALLY WHEN HE SAYS I CAN'T DRAW!!!

I'M GONNA GRAB THE TOOLS AND I'M GONNA BUST

HIS FUCKING HEAD!! AT LEAST HIS DICK HEAD, THAT MAKES HIM CAN'T SEX FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE!!

I'M FUCKING SERIOUS NOW, AND I'M MOTHERFUCKING SWEAR IT!!!!

HOLY FUCKED GOD, PLEASE INSPIRE THAT
FUCKER SOHAI TO READ THIS BECAUSE I'M NOT
GONNA TELL WHAT I'M GOING TO DO ABOUT HIM
NEXT TIME.
SO IF YOU CARE ABOUT YOUR SO-CALLED-
MOTHERFUCKING-CHILDREN-AND SON OR WHAT-
SO-FUCKING-EVER, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
INSPIRE HIM TO READ THIS FUCKING SOHAI POST,
BECAUSE I WRITE THIS FOR HIM, EXCLUSIVE!!